The government said "You must take the simlock off people's phones on request free of charge after 6 months of contract".
'Ha !' thought my phone operator, ever colourful...
So they put in place a four-step automated desimlocking process with text messages shooting back and fore.
1. Send us your email address.
2. Send us the IMEI of your handset.
3. Wait 15 minutes.
4. We can't do it this way, phone Customer services.
So you phone customer services and they say "press 1 for... 4 for desimlocking your phone" and it takes you back round the loop again. Just as unsuccessfully.
So you go on the website and look on the customer service forum. It appears that some people have died while trying to get their phones unsimlocked. Died from old age. People who were young when they started the process.
You find another customer service number. You call it from your mobile.
It says "Sorry, we can't do this from your mobile, please call the landline number and choose "9"".
So you do that. It says "9 isn't a valid choice". I persist and press 9 . Lots.
It says, "Hang on, we'll try and get someone to talk to you. Oh sorry they're all busy. call again later."
Still, at least now I have memorised the IMEI number for my mobile.