les Davey de France

Alan and Pat live and work in Bordeaux. Alan is a pastor and Pat was a nurse. Now we work with UFM worldwide. Read on! (If you'd like to know what took us to Bordeaux, then start with the archives from September 2004)

Monday, January 23, 2017

So relieved!

Saturday evening at about 5pm, the sudden thought comes - quickly, without warning, unannounced, as if from nowhere - "You should have been on duty in the Maison de la Bible this morning, the 21st of January, and you forgot to go."

Anguish and terror seize my heart with a strong, swift, vice-like grip.

I dare not look in my diary.

I tell Pat, 'I think I forgot to be in the Maison de la Bible this morning."

"Oh dear. What does your diary say?"

I dare not look, but look I must, so I brace myself, take a deep breath, poke the little square and up it comes.

Nothing. There is nothing noted for that morning!

Relief is short lived, a mayfly, a shooting star of hope.

"I bet I forgot to note it in my diary!" Like a gambling addict in a bent casino, which essentially means any casino, I know I cannot win.

"I'll ask Catherine."

"No, don't worry about it. There's nothing you can do now anyway."

I listen to the voice of reason, but reason cannot drive out the dreadful feelings of guilt, culpability and blame.

Yesterday at about 14:00 hours Catherine sends me a text message about something else.
I reply, surreptitiously appending, "Did I forget to be in the MB yesterday morning?"

No response came.

It's an obvious "yes".

They're trying to spare my feelings.

Oh dear, it's time to engage a personal carer.
I can no longer live unsupervised in this world.
I contemplate a bleak future being spoon-fed and accompanied to the cough-cough bathroom.

At 20:00 another message. Tacked on the end thereof, "No, it was John's turn."


No comments: