At the hospital

I'd never been the the centre for hepato-gastro-enterological surgery before, so I let Waze guide me. Big mistake. It told me to take two entrances that were gated and locked - I can't imagine what the driver of the van behind was thinking, thankfully he didn't tell me - and once in the hospital complex it had me driving round in all directions. Eventually I saw a building that looked like the one on the map I'd looked at previously so I parked near it and went inside.

Incidentally this hospital has a beautiful free car park and also a nature trail through its grounds. Maybe a idea for another time.

In France you go to the main reception, take a number, wait to be called and they enter you into the hospital database. Then they tell you where to go. Everywhere is colour coded. Even the reception desks. I stared intently trying to distinguish the yellow and the green, the blue and the violet. Anyway when my number came up I chanced upon the correct desk. "Go to the orange waiting room" said the guy. "I'm colour blind", I said. "OK, waiting room number 4, it's the second one you come to on the left." I found it easily.

I waited in the waiting room. It seemed the right thing to do. I was very early, as usual. I could see the door with my doctor's name on it. Other doors opened and closed, people came and went, but my doctor's door never moved.

A lady came in concerned that she was not getting her fibroscopie. She discussed with the reception desk. "Look, it's the right date". It was, but it wasn't in the system. Some more discussion ensued, then she got another date that suited her and went away happy. 

I wondered what a fibroscopie is. Whatever it is, they had a room for it, or at least a door labelled "Fibroscopie".

Eventually at about 4 the door opened and two people came out, one obviously a doctor. There followed some to-ing and fro-ing and scuttling about, then a moment of calm, then "M. Davey"

I went in. She started at the very beginning. Checked pretty much everything there was to check. Then said, "So, it will be a colonoscopy. This is what is entailed (ha - geddit? en-tailed !), these are the risks, this is what you need to do, and this is when it will take place."

I said, "In England there's no general anaesthetic. They give you a cup of tea, then hop!"

"Yes, in France we do a lot of anaesthesia."

So my appointment with the anaesthetist is for the 29 September. The colonoscopy will follow between 3 days and three months after that appointment assuming the anaesthetist is happy.

To prepare I have to eat a low residue diet for a few days, then use a preparation called "Moviprep" (I laughed) for the la purge. "Vous allez passer une nuit ... perturbée !" said the doctor, somewhat too cheerfully for my taste.

I thanked her, we said goodbye, but did not shake hands, and off I went to read the many sheets of A4 she'd printed off for me.


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